laureli ivanoff

I have prayed for a friend. A womanly presence, solace and comfort. And when the prayer was answered, I was amazed, thankful and relieved at the faithfulness of the Creator who listened. Who didn’t forget me. Who hears me when my heart is openly hurting and in need. God, thank you.

This summer I prayed for women in my life. Someone to talk with. Someone who listens and understands. But God, She knew what I needed and went deeper than my human-mind’s requests. God gave me the prayers of friends. The non-judging listening ears and hearts. The silent, but knowing check ins. The meetings of the heart. And I thank Her.

I prayed because I grew up surrounded by loving women. My Mom. My Aunt Zoe. My Auntie Abuz. Women who fed us, laughed with us, told smiling stories. Cut fish. Gossiped. Stood and sang in the choir. Sat and prayed silent prayers. Received answers. Celebrated our success. Held us when we were scared. Fed us pie, bread and akuutaq. Jam, smoked fish and soup. Who filled their warm houses with spice, spunk, secrets, dancing, hugs and reassurance. With them, life was light.

And just like that, they were gone.

So we’ve lived our adult lives without them. Wondering. Who to turn to. Who to cry to. Who to call when we’re unsure. When we’re hurting. When we’re celebrating. When we’re proud. When we’re scared. When we’re so anxious we can’t breathe. When we are overflowing with joy the earth rejoices with us. Who do we turn to? When we need the acceptance and comfort and love of a mother. God, help us.

God, She hears us. Thank God.

And when we are unsure and hurting and so anxious it’s hard to breathe, She sends us women who listen, who pray, who comfort and accept. And again life is light.

God, thank you for these women who help us to continue. Who help us so we can fill our warm houses with spice, spunk, secrets, dancing, hugs and reassurance.